We can't handle your change

In this new years bloggage (Combination of blog and message) I’m going to talk about change, YOUR CHANGE. 2009 came to an end and believe you me no matter what your state was when it started; you changed by the time 31 December 2009 came. Lets talk a little bit.

At some point you are going to have to accept that you are constantly changing. Everyday you are growing, evolving, becoming, maturing, morphing, developing and CHANGING! No one stays the same no matter what drug they’re on and no matter what their academic achievement may be. You will also have to deal with the fact that sometimes your change is not very welcome to others, especially if its positive change. Have you ever noticed that folk seem to want to you to stay the same or get worse in whatever you may be facing in life? I’m not sure what it is but we seem to derive a form of pleasure at the failure of advancement of those around us. Some people want others to stay the same or to get worse because it helps them feel as if they’re going somewhere because they’re better off. I did a series of talks in our church some time ago on accomplishing your dreams. In that series I talked of how sometimes we gauge our progress based on other peoples lack of it. Folk feel more successful as long as others fail. You cannot and you must not use others failures or hardship as a yardstick for your success. Measure your success by your goals. If you really want competition compete with your former self not the guy next to you. You’re running a different race from them.

The people who are most upset and unwilling to accept your progressive, positive change are those closest to you. It’s hard for those who know you well to accept that you are making drastic changes in your life. We want you to remain somebody we can understand and explain. If you’ve always been depressed we want you to stay depressed, if you’ve always been broke we want you to stay broke, if you’ve always needed financial help from us we want you stay needing it, if you’ve always lived in a not so nice hood we want you to keep staying there. The moment you begin to do things that we have never known you to do we get uncomfortable with you. Especially when you begin to live in house like or better than ours, drive cars like or better than ours, wear clothes like or better than ours Try this little experiment next time you’re with a group of close friends or family. Get up and go and change your clothes for no apparent reason. You’ll notice that people will ask you why you changed; they’ll want to know what the matter is or what you’re planning to do. That’s coz when you start becoming what we don’t understand it throws our world out of sorts. We need you to stay the same so we can feel better about where we are and we can move further from you to keep ourselves feeling progressive and successful. People want to be able to define you so that they can confine you. If we define you according to your neighbourhood of residence, academic qualification, skin colour, salary bracket or social background then we can confine you to a certain type and level of life. We can’t handle your change coz it messes up our definition of you and it shatters our little shelf of achievements based on your lack of progress and past failures.

Folk who know you well cannot handle your change because they know your history. They struggled with Jesus being God’s son because they had known him as the carpenters’ son. They struggled with David as a King coz they knew him as a shepherd boy. They couldn’t handle Joseph’s dream as a ruler coz they had always known him as the last-born spoilt little brother. They can’t understand your change coz they’ve always known you as (fill in the blank) …………………………………. In Genesis 12 v 1 God had to relocate Abram so that something new could be accomplished in his life. Why did God not just bless Abram and make him into a great nation whilst in the midst of his family and friends? Simply because people who know you can be the biggest hindrance to becoming something great. I agree that family can also be a strong support but that is not always the case.

I’ve written to tell you today that you cannot live out this year by the expectations of others. You do not need anyone’s approval to become something different, you don’t have to answer any questions as to who you’re becoming and why you’re becoming. If they really want to know who or what you’re becoming then they’ll just have to wait and see when you’re done changing. Don’t let them write your 2010 script based on your past. Don’t let them condemn you to their definition of who you are based on where they are. Break their mould and STAND YOUR GROUND. Become what they never expected.